“Don’t be happy, be free”: a letter from my dad.

On my last day in Munich, I went to the Neuschwanstein Castle, and all the emotions got out of the lil box I try to keep well hidden in the back of my mind. I remembered my parents talking about their time in Germany, I thought about dad, and how much I missed him. I thought about how I have zero idea of what to do with my life, and how my parents, in my age, were already brilliant and inspiring people. Then, I started worrying about the money I was spending on the trip – although I only spent on food and cheap accommodation, it was still more money then I’d spend if I had stayed put in The Hague.

Thinking led to drinking a major migraine and feeling guilty for travelling when I’m supposed to be ~saving up for my future~.

That’s when I received a text from a cousin of mine. She said she was organising some things when she found a letter my dad sent her when she was on an exchange in the US – and that the letter had everything she wanted to say to me when she saw that I was travelling.

And, yes, the letter had everything I needed to read. Written 21 years ago, on the 3rd of June of 1996 (I wasn’t even one year old!), this letter has all the advice I had to hear and probably will ever need to hear. Or read. ♡

“I wanted to take this opportunity to give you a few suggestions, as I have travelled before. First of all, don’t feel bad about spending money. I know that you’re not going to spend it buying random stuff, and that whatever you want will be reasonable. So, go ahead. If there is a city, a concert or a museum you wish to go to, don’t leave it for later. If you find a course you’d like to take, take it. Whatever you spend now will be twice or three times more rewarding to your personal growth and satisfaction. Also, you don’t need to think about a job or a professional future. Think about your current inner and outer selves, what will make you richer and happier – this is why you’re travelling. You can think about the real life after you come back, but by then you’ll have gained a new perspective on things.

“Because of that, you also don’t need to worry about always being happy or cheerful. Sometimes, you’ll feel down, you’ll feel solitude and think that you’re wasting your time. It’s not like that. Solitude and feeling down also help with self-discovery. Because of this, don’t run from experiences just because they might seem frustrating or lonely. (…)”

“Go travel around Denver, the mountains in general…. Take a bus or a train, whatever is cheaper. Always stay at Youth Hostels, where you can meet a lot of people and get the hottest tips. Don’t think about visiting a lot of cities, because they’re all the same. The important thing is to meet a lot of people, and to travel for the pleasure of it and for what you’ll learn from it.

“If you wish to take any other courses, take them. Not for what you might learn at school, which is important, but for what you will experience apart from school, which is what is most important. Don’t be in a hurry to come back, no matter how much you miss home and home misses you. Stay for as long as you are having new experiences. And keep your eyes wide open, to not miss anything around you.

“As I said, the time is short. I can’t dwell on these advices. Live intensively all that seems interesting to you. Don’t be happy, be free. Free to be happy or sad, without fear.“

Thanks, dad. ♡

Hope y’all find this as inspiring and as timeless as I have found it. Hope it helps you somehow, as it helped me. If you want to vent, to complain about life or to give me extra advice, you can either comment below or tweet me @tweetsbysofi.

-xo